THEFLAGRANT.COM
  • Links
  • About
  • Video
  • Audio
  • Found
  • Comics
  • Words
    • Scott Poem
    • God Looks Through Ozone Hole
    • Infant's Finger Painting
    • Lady Satan Rehashed
    • Poltergeist Proof
    • Innocent Goat Man
    • Bowl of Mush
    • 200 Celebration
    • Earthworms
    • Why My Willy is Like Icons of the 70's
    • AI Writes Transformative Hotdog Song
    • Ghost of Widow's Husband
    • Babies Are Useless
    • Monk Urine Is Cleaner
    • George Santos Lies
    • BTS: What Does it Mean
    • Zookeeper Cuts Off Arm
    • HYDROMAN REHASHED
    • I Watch the Super Bowl
    • Tales of Terror - Hold My Hand
    • Oh How He Sat
    • The Change
    • You Got the Lyrics Wrong, Dilweed
    • Woman Chokes on Fortune Cookie
    • The Moon Must Be Stopped
    • Quora Questions
    • My Husband's Inappropriate Remarks
    • Family is a Cult
    • The Price of Success
    • Tales of Terror: The Baby
    • Spot the Differences Army of Darkness
    • I'm All Over It
    • Automatic Thank You Letter
    • Clueless Man
    • What's Buggin You?
    • Child's Playmate is Son of Satan
    • Ask An Expert
    • True Tales of Terror: High Beams
    • Slander Zendaya Buries Puppies Alive
    • Henry Cavill Fired as Superman: Races to Horse to be Paralyzed
    • Crappy Little Free Library Is No Amazon
    • Christmas Wish List
    • Extremist Americans Furious With Extremist Germans
    • Batman vs Hulk
    • Elon Musk Fires Himself
    • Congrats on Your Dumb Baby
    • What I'm Thankful For
    • Donald Trump Blames Matrix
    • Terror Within
    • What Scares You
    • Halloween Candy
    • Adult Happy Meal
    • Horror Movie Life Lessons
    • Dudley Dursley
    • Yellow Ribbon
    • Empty Nesters
    • Haunted Womb
    • Wolfman of Steel
    • Tales of Terror: Hook
    • After All
    • Elf on a Shelf Spin Offs
    • Pie
    • Baby Poetry
    • Florence of Arabia
    • Alec Baldwin Ten Percent
    • Wife TV Shows Bachelor
    • Breakfast Theresa
    • Sexy Demogorgon
    • Where Is My Toe
    • Pinocchio Protest
    • Vegas Disasters
    • Cosby Helps with Anesthesia Shortage
    • Taco Bell Toilet Suicide
    • Ukrainian Mad about Plants
    • Horror For Kids
    • Slander: Britney Spears
    • Elevator Operator
    • Chickens
    • Risk He Had To Take
    • Best Horror
    • Slander: Harry Styles
    • Beautiful Pony
    • Top Ten Wife TV
    • Civil War Essay
    • Aquatica Boy
    • Slander: Tom Holland
    • Abraham Lincoln
    • BatBoy
  • Links
  • About
  • Video
  • Audio
  • Found
  • Comics
  • Words
    • Scott Poem
    • God Looks Through Ozone Hole
    • Infant's Finger Painting
    • Lady Satan Rehashed
    • Poltergeist Proof
    • Innocent Goat Man
    • Bowl of Mush
    • 200 Celebration
    • Earthworms
    • Why My Willy is Like Icons of the 70's
    • AI Writes Transformative Hotdog Song
    • Ghost of Widow's Husband
    • Babies Are Useless
    • Monk Urine Is Cleaner
    • George Santos Lies
    • BTS: What Does it Mean
    • Zookeeper Cuts Off Arm
    • HYDROMAN REHASHED
    • I Watch the Super Bowl
    • Tales of Terror - Hold My Hand
    • Oh How He Sat
    • The Change
    • You Got the Lyrics Wrong, Dilweed
    • Woman Chokes on Fortune Cookie
    • The Moon Must Be Stopped
    • Quora Questions
    • My Husband's Inappropriate Remarks
    • Family is a Cult
    • The Price of Success
    • Tales of Terror: The Baby
    • Spot the Differences Army of Darkness
    • I'm All Over It
    • Automatic Thank You Letter
    • Clueless Man
    • What's Buggin You?
    • Child's Playmate is Son of Satan
    • Ask An Expert
    • True Tales of Terror: High Beams
    • Slander Zendaya Buries Puppies Alive
    • Henry Cavill Fired as Superman: Races to Horse to be Paralyzed
    • Crappy Little Free Library Is No Amazon
    • Christmas Wish List
    • Extremist Americans Furious With Extremist Germans
    • Batman vs Hulk
    • Elon Musk Fires Himself
    • Congrats on Your Dumb Baby
    • What I'm Thankful For
    • Donald Trump Blames Matrix
    • Terror Within
    • What Scares You
    • Halloween Candy
    • Adult Happy Meal
    • Horror Movie Life Lessons
    • Dudley Dursley
    • Yellow Ribbon
    • Empty Nesters
    • Haunted Womb
    • Wolfman of Steel
    • Tales of Terror: Hook
    • After All
    • Elf on a Shelf Spin Offs
    • Pie
    • Baby Poetry
    • Florence of Arabia
    • Alec Baldwin Ten Percent
    • Wife TV Shows Bachelor
    • Breakfast Theresa
    • Sexy Demogorgon
    • Where Is My Toe
    • Pinocchio Protest
    • Vegas Disasters
    • Cosby Helps with Anesthesia Shortage
    • Taco Bell Toilet Suicide
    • Ukrainian Mad about Plants
    • Horror For Kids
    • Slander: Britney Spears
    • Elevator Operator
    • Chickens
    • Risk He Had To Take
    • Best Horror
    • Slander: Harry Styles
    • Beautiful Pony
    • Top Ten Wife TV
    • Civil War Essay
    • Aquatica Boy
    • Slander: Tom Holland
    • Abraham Lincoln
    • BatBoy
Search by typing & pressing enter

YOUR CART

TRUE TALES OF TERROR

a foot missing a big toe

WHERE IS MY TOE?

One day, a young lad was skipping and frolicking merrily down a lane that ran innocently alongside the village cemetery when he stumbled across a toe. Now it was rather unusual to find a big toe so cleanly separated from its body and lying in the middle of the sidewalk, so the delighted boy picked it up and took it home. 
 
When the boys’ criminally neglectful parents saw what he had found, they congratulated him heartily and set about cooking the toe for dinner. That night, they feasted on toe burgers, toe au gratin, and toe fricassee, and the satisfied boy went to bed with a full stomach and a warm heart. 
 
But in the middle of the night, when the hour of midnight struck and the veil between this world and the next was momentarily parted, the slumbering boy was roused from his dreams by a low and plaintive cry from far out in the night.
 
“Wheeeere iiiiiiisss my toeeeeee?” the voice moaned.
 
Well, the groaning question was eerie indeed, but the boy figured that it sounded quite far away and, honestly, what were the chances that it had anything to do with the toe that he had picked up and eaten?  50/50 at best.
 
A few minutes later, the voice called out again, and this time it was right outside the young boy’s house.
 
“Wheeeere iiiiiiisss my tooooooeeeeee?!?”
 
This time, the boy felt an icy shiver run down his spine. The unearthly voice was very close now and sounded 30% less mournful and 60% more vengeful. The frightened boy pulled the covers up over his head and trembled like a leaf.
 
Seconds later, from within the boy’s room, the voice boomed out in anger, directly over his bed.
 
“WHEEEERE IIIIIIISSS MY TOEEEEEEEEE?!?”
 
“Okay, okay,” the boy sighed with more than a little attitude as he threw down his blankets and stared at the moldering figure before him. “Obviously, you know where it is or you wouldn’t have come all the way here. But if you know where it is, then you also know that to give it back to you is gonna take me a minute. Wait here.”
 
The irritated boy trotted down the hall to the kitchen and retrieved his mother’s best strainer before sequestering himself in the bathroom. After several minutes of intense straining and a few groans of his own, the boy managed to expel what was left of the toe into the strainer and he took it immediately to the ghost or zombie or cadaver or whatever it was.
 
The creature looked over the boy’s offering with a grimace of disgust, backing away as the foul odor overwhelmed him, and muttered one parting remark as he left the boy’s home.
 
“NEEEVEEEERMIIIIIND. YOUUUU CAN KEEEEEEP IIIIIT.”

 
MORE TRUE TALES OF TERROR
Proudly powered by Weebly