WHAT WOULD YOU PREFER?
Would you rather eat a tasty hamburger that is horribly bad for you - OR - wedge an entire apple into your body somewhere other than your mouth?
Would you prefer to watch your child spend a lifetime pursuing a goal only to fail again and again - OR - watch them give up now and coast aimlessly for forty years? (Either way you can laugh at them.)
Would you prefer to be run over by a two-ton semi-truck carrying hogs - OR - one carrying hog-shaped twinkies?
Would you prefer to have unprotected sex with a rabid rottweiler - OR - Donald Trump? (Who also may be rabid.)
Would you prefer to be an airplane - OR - a duck?
Would you prefer to fart for eight hours straight until your backdoor is wind-burned and chapped and the air around you becomes literally unbreathable - OR - have your picture mocked online by 800 people. (Oh, and the picture is of you drowning a puppy.)
Would you prefer to make something of your life - OR - waste it all reading stuff on this website?