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  • Links
  • About
  • Video
  • Audio
  • Found
  • Comics
  • Words
    • Scott Poem
    • God Looks Through Ozone Hole
    • Infant's Finger Painting
    • Lady Satan Rehashed
    • Poltergeist Proof
    • Innocent Goat Man
    • Bowl of Mush
    • 200 Celebration
    • Earthworms
    • Why My Willy is Like Icons of the 70's
    • AI Writes Transformative Hotdog Song
    • Ghost of Widow's Husband
    • Babies Are Useless
    • Monk Urine Is Cleaner
    • George Santos Lies
    • BTS: What Does it Mean
    • Zookeeper Cuts Off Arm
    • HYDROMAN REHASHED
    • I Watch the Super Bowl
    • Tales of Terror - Hold My Hand
    • Oh How He Sat
    • The Change
    • You Got the Lyrics Wrong, Dilweed
    • Woman Chokes on Fortune Cookie
    • The Moon Must Be Stopped
    • Quora Questions
    • My Husband's Inappropriate Remarks
    • Family is a Cult
    • The Price of Success
    • Tales of Terror: The Baby
    • Spot the Differences Army of Darkness
    • I'm All Over It
    • Automatic Thank You Letter
    • Clueless Man
    • What's Buggin You?
    • Child's Playmate is Son of Satan
    • Ask An Expert
    • True Tales of Terror: High Beams
    • Slander Zendaya Buries Puppies Alive
    • Henry Cavill Fired as Superman: Races to Horse to be Paralyzed
    • Crappy Little Free Library Is No Amazon
    • Christmas Wish List
    • Extremist Americans Furious With Extremist Germans
    • Batman vs Hulk
    • Elon Musk Fires Himself
    • Congrats on Your Dumb Baby
    • What I'm Thankful For
    • Donald Trump Blames Matrix
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TRUE TALES OF TERROR

​THE BABY

Paige Miller giggled and cooed into the cherubic face of her bright and beautiful new baby, Stinky.  He was aptly named for even as Paige initiated the fifteenth game of peek-a-boo that day, she could smell the present that baby had made for mommy in his Pampers.  With a sigh, she hoisted him up out of his highchair and took him to the changing table.

She took the old, filthy, stinking, dripping, leaking diaper off the baby’s soiled, rash-covered bottom and draped it over a lamp.  Then she reached to open a new box of Pampers.

Suddenly, and without warning, the phone rang!  Paige agonized for a moment.  She couldn’t leave the baby unattended, but the phone was still ringing.  What to do?  What to do? Finally, unable to wait any longer, she made a decision.

“Stinky, you sit-sit while mommy answers the phone-phone.”  And with that, Paige left the baby on the table sitting on his new unfastened diaper and went to answer the phone.  She made the conversation a short one and hung up after only ten, maybe fifteen minutes.

But… when she returned to the dressing table… the baby… was gone!  Paige looked on the right side of the table.  No baby!   On the left side.  No baby!  The baby was not on the table!  But sitting right there in the middle of the dressing table… was the empty diaper!

And Paige, as she stared down at the lone diaper could have sworn that she heard the diaper… BURP!!!
​
She was wrong, of course.  The baby had crawled away… naked!

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