SLANDER!
HARRY STYLES COERCES TODDLERS INTO CHILD LABOR!

GQ’s most stylish man of the year, Harry Styles, has more than his good taste and stylist to thank for the honor, as he owes a great deal to the ones who actually hand stitch each and every piece he wears… a dungeon full of underage forced laborers. 

The former One Direction star who has now virtually exploded as a solo artist, opted to assemble his own work force here in America because he doesn’t want “the grubby hands of a bunch of dirty foreigners touching my stuff.” 

It wasn’t difficult for the “Dunkirk” star and singing sensation to lure the small frys into his home under the pretense of snapping a “selfie,” and once inside, the urchins found themselves in leg irons, bolted to a sewing machine, and just as trapped as Styles’ former love interests Taylor Swift and Kendall Jenner. 

But you have to admit it folks… he does look good!