IRREFUTABLE SCIENTIFIC PROOF
OF THE EXISTENCE OF POLTERGEISTS
AND POLTERGEIST PHENOMENA
Scientists at some big important university have definitively concluded that poltergeists are a verifiable real world phenomenon based on the following infallible logic chain.
1. Fact: I did not see a poltergeist.
2. The fact that I did not see a poltergeist does not imply, nor can one logically infer, that the poltergeist didn’t see me… which is why I always try to look my best.
3. If the poltergeist can see me here in this plane of existence, then one can logically conclude that the poltergeist exists in this same plane… or an adjacent one with a little window to peek through.
4. Therefore, the poltergeist exists. (Plus, somebody keeps throwing plates at my head and my wife swears it wasn’t her, so you do the metaphysical math.)