LIFE LESSONS I'VE LEARNED FROM HORROR MOVIES
Anthony Perkins taught us that the unique bond between a mother and son cannot be severed, even by death… but a girl in a shower, oh yeah, she can be severed pretty easily.
Night of the Living Dead
This film showed us that the “good old days” were anything but. Not only were terrifying zombies rising from the grave, but everyone living back then was in black and white.
While inferior to the original Japanese film, Ringu, this Gore Verbinski remake still enlightened us to the danger of VHS tapes. (Kids! VHS tapes were how we used to stream movies!)
House of Wax
A Vincent Price classic from 1953 that revealed to the world that nothing was scarier than… wax!
Silent Night Deadly Night
This holiday horror flick warned us that we’d better watch out. He knows when you are sleeping. He can slip into your house when all the doors and windows are locked. Those aren’t sleigh bells! They’re SLAY BELLS!
Perhaps the most famous blob in all of Hollywood history, the titular star of this 1958 film illuminated us about self-acceptance and tolerance, paving the road for other shapeless luminaries such as Blob Newhart, Blob Hope, and the soon-to-be-born Blob Odenkirk.
This film taught us that everyone has setbacks. Studio executives at Universal expected this unique new boogeyman to draw viewers to the theaters in droves, but unfortunately, no one saw him.
We learned about precipitation levels in this John Carpenter film featuring Jamie Lee Curtis, perhaps the most well-known horror movie about a basic weather phenomenon.
Friday the 13th
A blatant attempt to copy the success of the Halloween movie two years earlier, this 1980 slasher flick made slaughtering teenagers fun again while revealing the very important lesson: Moms can be serial killers too.
The classic film trained us to fear Michael Myers years before he made unwatchable movies like The Cat in the Hat and the Love Guru.